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“why follow your dreams when you can follow me?”

Sully – 2022

Gandmamaso visits the Milk Factory

                Gandmamaso wheezed as she stopped at the entrance of “100% Milk”, a milk factory. 100% Milk was located in the center of the island of Puerto Rico. In the parking lot, about a dozen broken down cars sat. One of them didn’t even have any wheels but stood on four cinderblocks. A disgusting scent wafted down from a huge nuclear cooling tower.  Gandmamaso took a swig from the mysterious hip flask she carried around in her robes and was instantly rejuvenated. Gandmamaso was not tired anymore from the 15-mile jog. In fact, Gandmamaso felt like she could heave the whole milk factory over her head. The swig of milk had infused all of the cells in her body with milk.

                Gandmamaso hobbled toward the turning doors of the milk factory. Even milk, the all-powerful substance, couldn’t heal 350 years of arthritis in the knees. As she entered, Gandmamaso’s nostrils shriveled up as the smell of bleach entered her nose. “What is this putrid scent?” Gandmamaso croaked. Gandmamaso hobbled over to the reception desk, were a young child was playing Fortnite on the computer. “Billio”, read the nametag. “I would like to have a tour of your, um, pleasant factory.” Gandmamaso raised her wooden cane, pressing the power button on the computer when Billio didn’t answer. “Yo! I was just about to get me a Victory Royale! Fine, you have your tour.” A wide, toothless grin spread across the Milk Mother’s face. “By the way, do you happen to be lactose intolerant?” asked Gandmamaso casually.  

                15 minutes later, Gandmamaso was being led along the catwalks that spanned the inside of the nuclear cooling tower. The tour guide, who was Billio’s friend, Jillio, was nervously flipping his nametag. The wild grin pasted across Gandmamaso’s face was enough to turn anyone’s legs to jelly. “T-This is where w-we pour the b-bleach, the KLIM, and t-the w-water into the mixing b-bowl.” He stuttered. “What is this ‘KLIM’?” Gandamamaso asked curiously. “Oh, KLIM is a milk powder, we crush concrete and sand together to make it!” Jillio seamed proud that their milk factory didn’t even use fresh milk. “You don’t use fresh milk?” The grin was wiped off of Gandmamaso face, and was replaced with a dark  frown. “I guess you could say th-“ Jillio was about to say, but as quick milk, Gandmamaso whipped her wooden cane and the end transformed into a titanium switchblade. With a quick flick, the Milk Mother severed the head off of Jillio’s neck. Jillio’s body spasmed, and his head fell into the mixing bowl. “Choke on the drivel you call milk!” Gandmamaso cackled. The switchblade folded neatly back into Gandmamaso cane. “It’s time to destroy this faux milk factory,” Gandmamaso thought out loud. She pulled a black container from her milky white robes and pulled the metal lever. Gandmamaso dropped the nuclear warhead. There were only seconds until it would combust. Gandmamaso lifted her robes, and shot into the sky, powered only by milk. Gandmamaso looked down, taking another swig from her flask.

                Just then, the entire factory turned bright white. The shockwave almost knocked Gandmamaso out of the sky. Then the sound reached Gandmamaso, a blasting sound so loud the metal hip flask shattered. What remained of the factory was nothing but a 150-foot crater a mile wide. Who cared if innocent civilians were killed? At least no more fake milk would be produced. Gandmamaso flew away.


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