Category: Funny
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Gourmet Shef Goes To McDonalds
“Eheh!” Shef cackled like a goose as he waddled his short, squat, squash-like body up the main street. Shef waggled his eyebrows at a gaggle of young women crossing the street. “Hey bebe! Want to come back to my restaurant? I have a blackbird pie you would DIE for! Literally!” Shef was not kidding…
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Linebacker
Linebacker was a short, stubby young boy. Linebacker was his first, middle, and last name. He was born to play football. Ever since the football player was three years old, he enjoyed smashing into his schoolmates in kindergarten, causing extreme pain, and in most cases, hospitalization. Linebacker’s motto was: “If it stands in…
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Yatimae Wants Hot Tea
“I want hot tea!” shouted the tiny toddler, smashing her fist on her parent’s door at 4 in the morning. Yatimae was a stingy, greedy, and spoiled three-year-old baby, but everybody acted like she was a perfect princess. Yatimae had a craving for hot tea ever moment of the day. She would command her servants,…
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Dullman and Saud try reading class
Dullman yipped excitedly as Saud clicked “Join Meeting”. “Chantil will be excited to teach us!” Saud thought out loud, as the zoom meeting started. Chantil was Dullman and Saud’s reading teacher. She was smart because she chose virtual classes instead of meeting in person. Nobody wanted to be anywhere within a fifteen-mile radius of…
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Goumet Shef makes Spaghetti
Shef cackled with delight and he pushed the heavy metal spade into the ground. He was in the graveyard in the middle of the night. A full moon blazed down, illuminating the headstone where Shef was stationed. He wheezed with exertion as he heaved his flabby stomach into his foot, which pushed the blade…
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‘Addysaurus
It was late in the morning on Isla Arena, an island off of the coast of Puerto Rico. A large lab had been set up right in the middle of the fifteen-mile stretch of lush jungle. Once you passed through the double sealed airlock, you would be greeted by a large cage with a…
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Shef makes Stew
Shef cackled in his hut. Ever since he had been discovered “selling unauthorized produce in a public attraction”, he had been living in the Amazon rain jungle. His bean strew was almost done soaking in itself! He raised his long, thin fingers, and wafted the smell of his cooking toward his enlarged nostrils. The…
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Linebacker gets the Nuclear Football
Linebacker loudly heaved the rest of his lunch out onto the White House’s pristine grass lawns, groaning in pain He really shouldn’t have trusted the shady man selling the “bean burritos” down on Town Square. After he finished emptying his stomach, Linebacker sullenly gazed up at the White House’s enormous form. Ever since his…
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‘Addy robs a bank
‘Addy slipped on his black ski-mask and donned gloves and boots with metal spiked cleats. His plan was going smoothly so far. He peered out of the bathroom stall to make sure nobody was inside, and quietly tip-toed out. According to his watch, it was exactly 8:59 PM. The bank was closed to anyone. …
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Dullman and Saud go to the Zoo
It was approximately 6:00 AM in the morning. Jamala and Lookman, the twin’s older siblings, were at the local farm, purchasing a several 100lbs bags of dirt. Macken, the children’s mother, was sitting watch in the front of the car, holding a tranquilizer dart at the ready. She was slowly snoozing off though, it was,…
sully 