It was exactly 5pm in the Las Vegas Hilton Hotel. Inside of the auditorium, a huge crowd of about fifteen thousand strong was cheering and clapping, some even booing, as the contestants for the evening MMA match strolled out onto the ring.
On the huge flat-screen’s above, the contestant’s names were flashing.
“Sensei Shihan – 1st, Fights dirty, cheats”
“Hawwy P. Pottah – 2nd, Has a magic wand, also cheats”
“Maleb Caddix – 3rd, Rams with diamond-hard head”
Hawwy grunted as he lifted his tiny body onto the pedestal for the scale. The weigher, Jimmy, balanced out the weight and announced.
“Hawwy P. Pottah! 50 Pounds!”
Jimmy lifted Hawwy’s stubby, grimy hand into the air. The crowd burst into cheers and boos. Hawwy was the most popular fighter since his magic was very bright.
Sensei Shihan was next. He had on his stained white Gi, something he always wore, even to sleep. The short man absorbed the crowd’s reactions like a sponge. “Sir, please step onto the weight,” Jimmy instructed the cheating karate instructor. Sensei Shihan glared at the man but obeyed.
Looking closely at the readout on the weigher, Jimmy skeptically announced.
“Sensei Shihan! 500 Pounds?”
Sensei Shihan grinned malevolently and hopped back off of the weigher. Jimmy looked back at the crowd, and motioned for a large, buff man to come forward. Billy, the security guard, roughly grabbed Sensei Shihan by the waist, and shook. Like it was raining, all sorts of heavy weights started tumbling out of Sensei Shihan’s karate uniform and onto the padded floor. Sensei Shihan struggled, but the Billy emptied all of the weights. Suddenly, a large barbell fell onto the Billy’s foot. He cried out in pain and kicked the 250-pound weight off of his crushed toes. Jimmy grabbed Sensei Shihan and easily plopped him back onto the weigher. Balancing out the weights, he announced.
“Sensei Shihan! 48 pounds!”
Sensei Shihan growled. His trick to gain weight had been discovered! Sensei Shihan prowled away.
It was Maleb’s turn. The giddy boy was being held by his father, Madt. Madt had a towel around his neck and was huddling in the corner of the ring. Madt, also Maleb’s coach, shook the boy by his neck. “DO YOU UNDERASTAND ME? YOU ARE A SAVAGE!”
Maleb shrieked what his father told him. “THAT’S RIGHT DAD! IMMA SAVAGE!” Madt smiled. Finally, his disappointment of a son was getting the recognition he didn’t deserve.
“Now go! Weigh-in!”
Maleb cackled and rushed toward the ring’s border. Jimmy grabbed the child before he could jump outside of the fighting ring and slammed him down onto the weigher. Jimmy looked at the weight and called.
“Maleb Caddix! 53 Pounds!”
Finally, the match was about to begin.
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